Admit it. You're a lazy fuck. You want to skip stones down by the pond but don't actually want to bend down and pick any up. God forbid you actually have to spend a minute sorting out the flat ones.
Hand-Picked Skipping Stones is the Kickstarter for you!
Imagine the joy of getting your very own box of rocks in the mail!
Picture the excitement as the postman lofts it at your doorstep and it sails through your glass window!
Sheer minutes of pulse pounding spine tingling "something" as you chuck rocks at the nearest watering hole!
All this for a mere $25 per box of 20
Order now! Supplies are limited! Shipping is FREE (where permitted by law)
Fine Print - Suckers are born every minute. Except where prohibited by law, suckers are STRONGLY encouraged to opt for the optional rope and bamboo carry set. After delivery, rocks may be placed in head to replace missing brain matter where applicable. ROCKnskippers.com is not responsible for broken windows or cranial injuries that might result from improper use of Skipping Stones. Use only as directed. Possession of Skipping Stones may be restricted by law in certain jurisdictions. Please check with your local Law Enforcement before throwing stones, especially in the vicinity of glass houses. Do NOT use with sticks. Use with sticks may result in broken bones (but names will never hurt me).
I thought you were going for something that might appear in The Onion. And then I followed the link, and no, it's real.
ReplyDeleteAmazing. I may try selling grass clippings to urban dwellers next year - for those who love the smell of fresh cut grass, but lack a yard of their own.
Hey. Pet rocks made it big in the '70s. This one makes perfect sense to me.
ReplyDelete